in english class today my teacher asked “what is the definition of poetry” and he called on me and i said “any type of writing that is not prose” and he got very angry because his lesson plan was to have a twenty minute discussion about the definition of poetry and then tell the class the definition was any writing that wasnt prose and apparently i ruined his lesson so he took my talking privileges away


look at it like this

when a girl gets rejected, she thinks it’s something that she did or did not do, she thinks there’s something wrong with herself that would make a guy not wanna be with her

but when a guy gets rejected, he thinks there’s something wrong with the girl who rejected him, ‘she just wants to date assholes’, ‘she’s a bitch’, so on and so forth

and that’s some bullshit

A list of A+ insults



if u R ever in an argument use these insults and u will make the other person cry bc there R so good

  • half eaten sandwich
  • useless fungal infection
  • literal turd burger
  • Netflix® buffer
  • 2003 fergie
  • 5th president James Monroe
  • half chewed pencil
  • The Commonwealth of Pennsylvania
  • absolute white crayon
  • quiet meme thief
  • TI-84 plus Silver Edition™ Calculator by Texas Instruments®
  • diarrhea apocalypse



Petition to sit down all the people who make coma theories about Adventure Time and tell them “listen, this fucking show is about the last human living in a post-apocalyptic world where deadly magic has been reawakened following a global thermonuclear war that wiped out the rest of the human species, how much fucking darker do you want it to be”


satire is “I’m going to take this concept to an extreme or absurd level in order to demonstrate how bizarre/nonsensical/illogical it is” and not “I said something bigoted but just kidding I didn’t really mean it hahaha”