Remember when Thanos got cockblocked by Deadpool?
someone: agent washington, the reds and blues are missing we think they might be dead
wash, sitting by the pool, reading a harlequin, sipping a mint julep, getting his toes done: show me bodies.
someone: um excuse me sir?
wash: no body, no proof. now move you’re blocking my sun.
carolina, emerging from the pool like a shark: and bring us more guacamole.
#Someone else: Here it’s their armor. We have still yet to locate the bodies but their armor is empty and covered in blood.#Wash: Oh dear god they’re naked and coming for us.
(because it didn’t feel complete without @colonelsargestillincharge‘s contribution)
upon learning Shuri is 16 in Black Panther, I quietly revise all my original shipping plans from “adults” to “Shuri is a hopeless baby lesbian with a crush on every single Dora Milaje and soon a big useless enormous crush on MJ, who is like a semi competent but mostly just grungy bisexual with a super popular twitter account that Shuri is obsessed with and MJ is s t o k e d about everything about Wakanda and tweets that she’s doing her senior research project on Wakandan tech and T’Challa, who follows his baby sister’s online crush’s twitter so he can forward Shuri the most embarrassing tweets that will make her furious (“YES BROTHER I DID SEE THAT SELFIE AND I DON’T NEED YOU TO REMIND ME OFF IT”), is like “this is the moment I was born for. This is why I became king” and tweets MJ like “we’re doing youth outreach, come to Wakanda, my very talented and smart and accomplished sister will give you a personal tour :)” and MJ and Shuri simultaneously die”
the Dora Milaje prepping for MJ’s visit by giving Shuri different and conflicting romantic advice until Okoye tells them it is against their sacred duty to torment the princess into a crush-induced panic attack because she cannot decide between her top twelve outfits and cool confident quips for making a good first impression
MJ meanwhile with Peter is repeatedly punching him in the arm because he just told her that he met T’Challa and she’s furious this hasn’t come up before, and also he’s Spider-man, but that’s not nearly as important as KING T’CHALLA WHAT, DID HE TALK ABOUT HIS SISTER AT ALL, MJ’S BEEN FOLLOWING ARTICLES ABOUT HER FOR YEARS AND SHE SEEMS DOPE AND CUTE AS HELL
THIS IS THE MOMENT I WAS BORN FOR THIS IS WHY I BECAME KING WE’RE DOING YOUTH OUTREACH i feel like i want all of mj’s freaking out to be locked down tight behind the grungy bisexual facade until she really just CAN’T anymore and she steps off the plane and shuri’s there in person shuri is an overflowing fountain of eager delight and crush mj has got this cool locked down until shuri asks how she is and she says ‘your plane was very good’and then does 500000 internal facepalms (@takiki16)
Shuri, so excited and nervous that 10 percent of her attention is freaking out about how she can smell MJ oh no she smells so good, and 70 percent is on trying not to jitter so hard she thrums into a new plane of existence (and then the remaining 20 percent for figuring out cold fusion, nbd): HELOO M-UH-MMM- MICHELLE. DO YOU PREFER TO BE CALLED MICHELLE AND WELCOME TO MY BEAUTIFUL COUNTRY OF WAKANDA. WOULD YOU LIKE TO PHOTO WITH IT FOR YOUR INTERNET FRIENDS. I AM SHURI. YOU MUST KNOW THAT ALREADY. HAHA MY BROTHER TOLD YOU ABOUT ME. I WILL MURDER HIM.
MJ, who has spent the last ten minutes hiding in the bathroom applying deodorant to basically every non-face part of her body because she can’t stop sweating oh my god stop sweating you’re sweating on a three hundred year old chair in a sitting room in a palace in fuckin WAKANDA, and who is so stressed that she’s transcended the human for and is now astral projecting somewhere behind her own body, distantly pitying this new york punk gremlin who thought Formal Plaid was a good idea talk to a real ass honest to god genuine princess with a beautiful smile holding a small cat robot that she hand designed this afternoon on a whim: dope. I love murder. call me MJ
#nearby dora milaje on protection detail: our girl said complete sentences#t’challa on the other end of the advanced super cool walkie talkie: i’m so proud of her. make them take a walk in the gardens together
tags via @andhumanslovedstories
I still can’t facking get over how good FMA really is like that was what you call good fucking writing and what was best about Ed as a character was that his character development wasn’t about him losing his personality and becoming more nice and good and yada yada, his character development was about learning to respect and rely on the people around him. At the end of the day he was still Ed, but a more empathetic Ed… This is what you call good writing
Yeah he really overcame his shortcomings
Why hurt him like this
hubris is starting a fic at 11:30pm and not looking at the wordcount