Me: waiting for any form of public transport
Some deep dark part of my brain that never forgot the first night vale episode: ?????????
Aries: “There’s a difference between your, you’re, and yarn. Yarn isn’t even pronounced the same way. It’s a completely different word.”
Taurus: “Knock, knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn’t say your mother’s in the hospital? I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Is there anything I can do? Listen, I’ll drive you over there. We’ll leave right now. Grab a coat, it’s a little cold out. I’m so sorry.”
Cancer: “You won’t sleep when you’re dead, either.”
Leo: “At your smallest components, you are indistinguishable from a forest fire.”
Virgo: “You can’t get blood from a turnip. Listen you need some blood? I can totally get you some blood. Set that turnip down and follow me to the blood. There’s a lot of blood.”
Sagittarius: “Ignore all the haters telling you that everything isn’t a sandwich. Everything is a sandwich.”
Aquarius: “Feeling lost? Like you have no goal in life? Like you’re covered in dirt and wet leaves? Like you’re an earthworm? Are you an earthworm? Kinda sounds like you’re an earthworm, actually.“
Capricorn: “Soccer is also commonly known as football, Canadian baseball, American football, violent jogging, and World War II.”
Gemini: “Everything that happens, happens for a reason. Except ostriches. What the hell, man?
Libra: “Please keep all arms and legs inside the car at all times. Also, you are under arrest. Why is your car full of limbs? Whose are these?”
Pisces: “Listen, I’m not a hero. The real heroes are the people that point out to us when protesters have smart phones, thus invalidating all concerns.”
Scorpio: “Thank you for your interest in a life free of pain. We are not accepting applications at this time. Please try again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again…”
I had a dream the other night that they made a Night Vale movie and that Cecil was introduced with a very dramatic shot of him walking down the station hallway until it pans down and you see he’s wearing light-up sketchers
came across the incredible wpa posters in the library of congress’s archives and thought it would be fun to repurpose a few of them for the world of night vale.