my exact sense of humor is screenshots of neoboard interactions and weird cynical commentary on the state of neopets by its veteran players. like for instance this picture annihilates me every time I think about it
tired of hearing about how saturn is the most fuckable planet just because it has the most rings. jupiter is clearly the most fuckable planet, and trust me, i’ve already heard your “oh the great red spot is an std” jokes, and i don’t care. and btw, the logistics of fucking the rings of a planet don’t make any sense. have fun trying to put your dick through a bunch of jagged rocks and ice, you piece of shit
this is like one of the best posts i’ve seen on tumblr and let me tell you why
“tired of hearing about” posts that then go on to delineate something i have literally never heard anyone talking about are hilarious
the idea of trying to rank the planets as fuckable is absurd
huffy “i don’t care”
nitpicking the logistics of something impossible
horrible mental image
ends very angrily
did you know that if you tried to fuck jupiter, it would rip you apart. jupiter is seen as the guardian of our solar system because its gravitational pull is very large so when large comets or something is comin our jupiter is like no bitch and sucks that shit up like theres no tomorrow and its theorized jupiter is eventually going to engulf its own moons or that it already has
Can I just say, uh, I’m pretty sure noticing you’re asexual is harder than noticing you’re gay, straight, pan or otherwise. Like, I just read someone’s desciption of hitting puberty and, like, there’s nothing like that. There’s no sudden ‘boob’ moment, no sudden ‘fuck, I’d fuck that’ moment, not sudden anything. You just, like, plod on through life as usual going ‘oooh, that’s pretty, I’d like that hair’ or ‘oooooh, they’re nice, I’d like to be close to them’ but there’s no like, ‘oh, someone would want to fuck that but I don’t’, you know? You just- you don’t notice, you don’t realise everyone else has ‘had a moment’ but you haven’t, you just- keep going as you always have.
And then, much much later, you start to wonder why people are getting so caught up in drama for romance or sex, like, why bother? It’s not worth it, they’re not worth it, why are you doing stupid things for something that’s so- and then you wonder if there’s something wrong with you, start mentally over compensating. Like ‘uh, okay, um, who should I date? Who can I stand to date? Who could I stand to fuck?’ like- it’s not, it’s not something you want, but you want to fit it, to be normal.
Sometimes you don’t even know that you’re doing it.
Sometimes you don’t even know asexual’s a thing.
I dunno, I guess, I just feel like, uh, people should understand more?
all this week has been “senior week” at my school only it has been unofficial and was completely orchestrated by the students without permission from administration and each day has had a theme so yesterday was “tourist tuesday” and every senior student dressed up in typical “tourist” outfits like hawaiian shirts and socks with sandals and fanny packs and sunglasses and all that and the administration thought it was funny until they started a “tour group” so the entire senior class didnt attend class at all and wandered the campus as a group with a “tour guide” pointing out and explaining random things to the entire group but it all went downhill when the tour group walked into a classroom and as the guide was giving the group a fake tour of the class one of the kids pointed to a widely hated teacher and asked the tour guide “what animal is that?” and thats the story of how my school issued 84 detentions in one day
