At a grocery store before I had top surgery there was a couple Infront of me. The guy was pointing at random folks around and saying to the girl, “I’d fight hit for him, I’d whoop him for you, I’d beat him for you.” She nods toward me and says “what about this dude behind you?”. I have my headphones in (without music) and I see the guy glance behind himself at me, make a face and look back to her. “Nah, girl, did you see his chest? He could probably knock me out with his pec, girl” Honestly it was a life changing event.
Today’s aesthetic: giant monsters in fantasy media who act like mindless howling beasts but somehow have the presence of mind to wear clothing on their lower halves so as to prevent the audience from seeing their giant monster dongs.
I’m not saying I would definitely read a story about the intrepid cosmic hero whose grand, divine, and righteous quest is to accost giant monsters and put pants on them, but I might.
Especially if the assorted monster bits are still somehow coyly kept out of view at all times by increasingly conspicuous convenient scenery and framing, Austin Powers style.
Concept: a D&D campaign whose ultimate goal is to put pants on the tarrasque.
now that undertale’s been announced for the switch, i feel like it’s time to remind everyone again:
regardless of what you think of undertale as a game, it’s completely harmless, so don’t fucking bash others (ESPECIALLY kids) for enjoying it, ya dipstick.
Reminder of some stuff about UT that people seem to have forgotten as well:
–Queer as hell –Nonbinary protag –Open lesbian romance between two important and awesome characters –Many incidental characters with “they” pronouns –Incidental gay romance (you end a boss fight by helping two men realize they love each other hecksake!!) –Main character who is trans or GNC (he gets the body he wants, it’s never defined what his body was before and that is BETTER honestly) –Toby Fox attempted to make good spaces for adults and kids before the game was even popular by asking people to tag adult content “#undertail” –Addresses the effects of abuse and made fandom seriously consider how much responsibility a hurt child holds for actions, and what it means to forgive
Like it or not, Undertale is a hell of a learning space, please let others experience that without “lololol cringe”. Honestly please let others experience everything without “lololol cringe”, it’s 2018 not 2006.
Relatable lesbian mood of the day: making tiny little flick knives for the crows to utilise, showing the crows my powerpoint of which politicians to kill, making little jumpers (for the crows), showing the crows how to mask up, being lesbian married (by the crow pope)
I was with you until that last part. The implication that crows are Catholic is offensive
Crows don’t worship any god they can’t eat the corpse of, but if they find an *awesome hat* on top of some guy in Italy they’re gonna wear it and perform blasphemous religious services. That’s just nature.
Oh shit, you right
A huge part of catholicism is consuming the flesh and blood of christ. Now, crows don’t care for the other shit, but they can get in on tacky shiny religious paraphernalia and eating flesh, hence crow catholicism.
As gardeners know, a tomato is not just a tomato. They come in all shapes, sizes, and especially colors, from tiny red gems to big and purplish brown to pear-shaped with zebra stripes. And their tastes and textures vary wildly as well, with some sweet and soft, some tough-skinned and tart, and some dense and destined for processing.
These varieties all have names, of course, and good names are at a premium. Darren Abbey, who runs the blog The Biologist Is In, breeds new tomatoes and needs to name them from time to time. He gave me a list of 11,629 existing names, ranging from the highly experimental (Rts-119) to the classic (Sungold).
I used these names to train a recurrent neural network, which is a kind of algorithm that learns patterns that let it imitate the data it sees. Could it learn to produce plausible tomato names?
Floranta Sweet Lightning Speckled Boy Flavelle Pinkery Plum Market Days Fancy Bell Mountain Gem Garden Sunrise Honey Basket Cold Brandy Sun Heart Flaminga Sunberry Special Baby Golden Pow
However, not ALL the names were plausible. These are a lot weirder.
Birdabee Sandwoot Shampy Bear Plum The Bango Grannywine Sun Burger Bungersine First No.4 Smoll Pineapple The Ball Golden Cherry Striped Rock Eggs Old German Baby Frankster Black Bumbertime Ranny Blue Ribber Adoly Pepp Of The Wonder Cherry, End Students Small Of The Elf Champ German Ponder Pearly Pemper Green Zebra Pleaser Flute First
These *seem* weird, but they aren’t actually all that weird for tomato names. There are at least 50 oxheart tomatoes in the original dataset.
Matt’s Sandwich Indigo Tree Sun Burger Striped Hollow Potato Leaf Lelly’s Yellow Stuffers Terra Pink Strain Greek Boar Ton’s Oxheart Babla’s German Paste Mortgage Lifter, Honey Blues
These however? These tomatoes don’t sound promising.
Speckled Garfech Green Dork Cluster Gall Shirve’s Gigant Bullburk True Grub Black Crape Caraball Roma Wasting Star Scar Giant Bug Beauty Banana Placente Bananana Stoner Speckled Bake Ruck Green Boor Wonder Bagg Sun Bung Bellende Bolosavyi Scarling West Colon Panterosa San Blue Tard Red Krap Shart Delight Solad Piss
And this post’s bonus content is well worth checking out, because not only does it contain many more tomato names, but I also tried an experiment where I trained a neural net first on tomato names, and then on the names of metal bands. The results were glorious, including such wonders as:
Angels of Saucing Serpent Green Market Death Sweet Sever Devil Potato Large Death
1. God Bless @lewisandquark for doing these expiriements 2. Tomato biologist is right, these are ALL plausible tomato names. I can probably write promo blurbs for all of them. 3. My Own Adventures With Tomatoes, if you want.
